I just completed an 11-day Gyrokinesis intensive training in Miami. This training was both arduous and inspiring. It’s always a pressure cooker when I go to trainings led by Juliu Horvath – there is a certain level of intensity, a quickening, just being around the creative and demanding brilliance of the founder of this work. These trainings are not for beginners; rather the 20-30 participating teachers had already attained some level of proficiency and were devoted to the work. The energy was electric!

Each day we learned the movements, the rhythms, the details, the tactile and verbal cueing – everything we needed to experience in our own body in order toe be able to teach this work. We spent time paired up with each other to practice, practice, practice . . . which can be nerve-racking. We all want to teach each other well, be present and available, give meaningful feedback – to be a brilliant teacher and an outstanding student.

During the final days of the training, we paired up to teach each other the formats in their entirety; one person would teach in the morning and after a long break, the other would teach in the afternoon.

My partner for the first format taught me in the morning. She did a lovely job and gave me a really good class. I felt well-worked and well-supported.

In the afternoon it was my turn. I always have a bit of performance anxiety in these situations and that caused me to fumble early on in the routine. Once I fumbled, I lost my “student” and, try as I might, I could not bring her back. In that brief moment of awkwardness, she became un-teachable – going through the routine on her own, not listening to my cues or engaging with me. That, in and of itself, was quite challenging. When it was over, her feedback was unkind and insensitive – and she would have nothing to do with the feedback I gave her. It was clear that she had decided I was an inferior teacher, unworthy of teaching her or giving meaningful feedback.

I was struck dumb – literally, my mind went totally blank. I felt frozen. It took awhile for me to come back to myself, to re-embody my being, to reclaim my confidence as a teacher. Once I did that and reflected back on the situation, well, a few things happened. First I wondered why I hadn’t slapped her, at least verbally. Once that passed, I realized that this young woman had missed an opportunity to be taught by me. She lost the chance to learn this work in a different way than how she teaches it. She was unavailable to learn from me the reverent, soulful and unfolding quality of this work as I teach it. I felt great sorrow in that – for both of us.

We all know there is an art to teaching. There is also an art to being teachable. My friend and spiritual mentor, Mary Gay Shafer and I have discussed this frequently and it is through her that this teaching becomes vividly clear and alive as a practice. The student and the teacher have a mutual responsibility to:

• be available to what is being taught
• actively extend an invitation so the material can be entered as deeply as possible
• give ongoing permission to be met,  instructed and guided

And, honestly, no matter how good or bad a teacher is, how relevant or unrelated a teaching may seem – if we are teachable, we will always learn, always gain from being open, and always receive the gift that any given moment has to offer. And, every moment is full of potential. Let yourself be vulnerable. Consider everyone and everything a worthy teacher. Throw out all the strategies of defense and be humbled by the vastness of what has yet to be discovered in this precious human experience. Choose to be teachable.

deep blessings to you, Carol

Stay Tuned! Mary Gay will be my guest author for the next e-rhythm on the art of teaching and leading.

“To be in a more selfless expression of service is to cultivate the kind of sensitivity that can detect degrees of receptivity. Knowing the extent to which someone is available, whether an invitation has been extended and/or if permission has been granted will guide you in the content and depth of your offering. Discerning these components of receptivity requires perceiving what is transpiring beneath the surface of your relationship.” Mary Gay Shafer

Often when we are attempting a new movement, our first reaction is confusion. If the routine is unfamiliar, we feel uncoordinated. When this newness points us toward a challenging aspect of our body in motion, we decide we are too weak or puny and give up – or try to power through it in an attempt to prove ourselves strong and able.

The truth is that our bodymind has simply not yet organized itself around the new information.

I recently took a series of classes from a very skillful Gyrotonic Master Trainer. It was great fun, quite challenging and very humbling. There was one particular move he asked me to do that my body had never done before. The first time I attempted it, I simply could not do it. After several attempts, I stopped and scratched my head and asked, “Where does that come from in my body and why can’t I do it?” He reminded me that it really isn’t about where it comes from; it’s about organizing around what you are asking your body to do.

This is clearly not just an intellectual endeavor. It is a process of patiently allowing the body to explore what is being asked of it so that the movement can unfold in a way that is natural and organic. The mind grasps a concept at lightning speed, part of its astonishing brilliance. The body, however, learns through repetition. This can sometimes put the mind and the body at odds, as the mind becomes impatient with the measured and deliberate way in which the body learns and integrates the movement. And yet, if they work together to contemplate and reiterate the move – it is a thing of beauty! It is through this union, communion and mutuality that deep intelligence awakens and courses freely through our being, quickly able to discern the mechanics, play with the sensations and pulsate with the exuberance of new found discovery. That’s the fun of it! It is in this process of unfolding that movement becomes meaningful, joyful and pleasurable!

A few days later, I tried the same impossible move and amazingly was able to do it! My body and mind, having percolated and contemplated, had organized around the information received through my first attempt. Now I could dive more deeply into the move, discover its nuances and relax into the pure enjoyment of my body in motion.

The next time you are attempting to learn a new move, become more adept in your sport, increase the difficulty of your current workout, acquire a skill that is unfamiliar – notice if there is any impatience, judgment or force in the learning and see if you can switch that to cooperation and curiosity. Let go of over-efforting and ease into the feedback that you are receiving from your mind and your body. Let it go for a day or two and see if that doesn’t bring a greater sense of clarity, ease and pleasure to your learning and to your body in motion.

Deep blessings, Carol

Good Morning – I began my day today with movement, particularly spinal articulation; what I consider to be a form of body prayer. I followed that with a brief meditation. How about you?

As I was contemplating the “Both/And,” it occurred to me that we spend an inordinate amount of time and energy resisting what we cannot understand, defending against the ambiguity that we are form and formless, unique and one, matter and non-matter – definitely boggles the mind! This resistance creates a wall of tension around our capacity to be fully who we are. So today’s “practice prompt” is to notice the ways in which you hold tension and then see if you can relax into the uncertainty in order to open to the possibility of full expression.

We are unique and individual.

We are one with everything.

Seemingly disparate and oppositional statements. Both are true and both arise simultaneously in every moment

How can that be?

This is what makes being human so fascinating. We are “both, and;” simultaneously unique and One – multi-dimensional and multi-faceted, distinct renderings of Life. And this only makes sense when we realize that we are, each and every one of us, an expression of the Divine – that is at once the Many as well as the One.

We tend to get lost in feeling separate, other, alone and disconnected – polarized in our uniqueness. What is important to realize is that our uniqueness does not make us separate; our belief in our separateness is the only thing that holds us apart from realizing our place in the all that is. The universal life force that animates everything (and that’s a lot!) expresses as the unique being that is you, me, them, us, we, thee . . . in all the infinite forms that can be expressed. Everything is a distinct interpretation and expression of God.

As a concept, this is doable, thinkable, perhaps even logical. As a reality, as a direct experience, it can be elusive. How then, do we make room for our uniqueness as an explicit expression of our universality?

Practice. There must be a deliberate turning toward the One in order for It to reveal you to yourself – an open-ended and sincere inquiry into the inescapable “both, and” that is your true nature as a human being. And, practice is, well, it’s unique – unique to each and every person! Perhaps it is meditation, or prayer, or mindful movement, or hiking, or chanting, or . . . the form does not matter as much as the intention with which you approach your practice and its relevance to you, your life and your way of being in the world. It seems to me that without an ongoing, meaningful and relevant practice, each of us will stay mired in suffering; the belief that “I am separate.”

I must confess, I’ve been a bit lax in my own practice lately and can feel the effect. I am more prone to moods, less nurturing of myself and others, caught in feeling alone, more stuck in front of the computer, and, and, and . . . I’m thinking I am not the only one in this circumstance.

Here is what I propose. I would like to embark, with you, on a 30-day immersion into the art and practice of “Both, And;” exploring our uniqueness as an expression of the One. And because the e-rhythm newsletter is not particularly interactive we could come together through my Rhythm of Life Blog (which you can subscribe to on the sidebar of my homepage: www.rolife.com). I will post my updates, practice prompts, insights, progress, challenges – and invite you to do the same through the response box at the end of each post. Also, when you subscribe to the blog you will receive “Liven Up” and “Notable Nuggets.”

Please join me – let’s create community around this worthy exploration of the inescapable, “both, and.” Let’s plan on starting on Monday November 1st and continue through the month.

in body & soul, Carol

This is a wonderful interview with Juliu Horvath, filmed at Angela Crowley’s studio, The Phoenix Center in Denver. This is the studio and the teacher that introduced me to this rich and nourishing world of intelligent movement.  Hope you enjoy this brief clip (about 6-1/2 minutes).

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GYROTONIC from phelan on Vimeo.

The foot, by definition, is at once a foundation – a firm stable base of support – and a flexible, adaptable lever that can maneuver us through irregular terrain. Flexible, viable, strong feet, help us move through life with ease and pleasure. Here are a few ways to explore and free your feet:

• Take a moment to visually connect with your feet (this means you have to take off shoes and socks). Do any of the toes overlap? Do your toes lay flat or curl a bit? Does the arch lift off the ground or does the whole foot lay flat? Is your foot wide or narrow? Do your feet look like your mother’s or your father’s (my little toes are an exact replica of my father’s, thanks Dad!)? If your feet could tell you something about your life, what story would they tell?
• Here’s good news, the feet are readily accessible to the hands! Put your right ankle on your left knee so that you can work with your right foot. With the thumb and forefinger of the right hand, grab your big toe. With the thumb and forefinger of your left hand, grab the second toe. Now scissor them apart, pulling the big toe forward and little toe back, then reverse. Now pull them apart sideways. Do these same actions with the second and third toes and continue through the last pair of toes. Be gentle with this exercise, especially if your toes aren’t used to such attention.
• Still working with the right foot, use both hands to massage all along the foot from the heel, through the arch and all the way through the toes, nice and vigorous. Don’t forget the top of the foot as well.
• The ankle is an important part of foot mobility. With your right ankle still on your left knee, use your left hand to hold on to the ball of your right foot, and your right hand to hold just above the ankle. Use your left hand to guide your ankle in a circle – be sure to roll through a hard flex (a much neglected position). Do this several times in each direction.
• Put both feet flat on the floor. Take a moment to feel the difference between the left and right foot? What do you notice?
• Now do all the above with your left foot, it wants to feel that good too.

If you must, put your shoes back on. If you don’t have to, let your feet be free, just hanging out in your socks or in loose shoes – anything that allows your feet to be less confined, more mobile – free . . .

And, if you’d like to explore the feet and their relationship to the rest of your body, please join me for “Save Your Feet, Knees & Hips,” a Yamuna Body Rolling class, coming up on November 13th. Click HERE for more information.

We, as human beings, are a complex blend of form and formless, made up of physical matter and energy – add to that the rich capacity for consciousness and what you have is a complex life form that is simultaneously finite and infinite.

We are matter – dense, physical, animal, body. We are energy – breath, essence, life-force, unseen. We are consciousness – self-aware, responsive, perceiving, evolving.  I find this to be fertile ground for exploration.

Breath is a wonderful way to experience this blend – we cannot see breath, yet it is essential to our physical life. And if we are conscious of our breath, we become present in this moment. Here are a few ways to play with your breath:

• Notice your breath as it moves in and out of your body. Sit quietly with your eyes closed and take a few natural breaths, becoming tuned in and aware. Slow the breath down and deepen it. As you inhale, feel the whisper of sensation in your nostrils, the passing of the air through your windpipe, the soft expansion of your lungs, the lift of your diaphragm, the subtle spreading of your ribcage, the quiet rise of your belly. As you exhale, feel the belly soften, the ribs drift in, the diaphragm relax and the throat open as the breath falls out of the body.
• Let yourself be breathed. Imagine that life is breathing you. Instead of actively inhaling and exhaling, become passive and pretend you are on a cosmic breathing machine that fills you with life giving breath and then receives that breathe back from you – an exchange of breath from the infinite to the finite and back again. Fun!

I also find movement to be great way to play with form and formless. The sideways figure 8, a symbol for infinity, is a holistic way to expand this experience and is incorporated into much of the movement in Gyrokinesis. Try this:

• Sit on the edge of chair or stool so that you can sit directly on top of your sit bones. Have your legs in an open V, and engage your abdominals so that you feel grounded and supported by your lower body. Now sit tall, lengthening the spine all the way from your sacrum to the top of your head. As you go through the movement, move the entire torso and head as one piece – like a stick figure.
• Tip from the hip and let the entire torso and head fall forward through the center as one piece. Sweep your body in a circular motion around and out to the right. Lean back at the center, then fall forward and sweep out and around to the left. Exhale each time you go through center and inhale as you go around to the back. Create a smooth continuous movement becoming more and more aware of the sideways figure 8 that you are creating with your body and with your breath.
• When you are comfortable with the basic move, close your eyes and continue moving in this pattern. Explore the round edges of infinity and the angular intersection as you pass through center on your way to the other side of infinity. See if you can feel how the infinite interacts and intersects with the finite, formless weaves through form and matter mingles with non-matter.
• Begin to make the physical figure 8 smaller and smaller, all the while allowing the energetic figure 8 to expand. Finally, come to rest in the center of the cross point of infinity. This is a place of great quiet, deep presence and grand neutrality. Take a few moments to savor and enjoy.

What other ways do you know of to explore and experience this multi-faceted human life?

in body & soul, Carol

“When God created Himself, He created Himself in two aspects: the Infinite and the finite. When you think of the finite, you think of form, and when you think of the Infinite, you feel that there is no form. However, inside the finite is the message of the Infinite; in the finite is first the revelation and then the manifestation of the Infinite. The finite is necessary because it is through the finite that the Infinite plays its role in the cosmic rhythm here on earth. At the same time, the Infinite is necessary because it is in the Infinite that the finite has its eternal shelter. There it finds protection and perfection.” Sri Chinmoy

I’m reading Spiritual Bypassing: When Spirituality Disconnects Us from What Really Matters by Robert Masters, and found myself particularly intrigued by the chapter, “Disembodied Spirituality and Embodied Being.” Here are some excerpts I thought you might find meaningful:
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. . . no matter how much we might neglect or mistreat it, our body calls us back through its aches and pains and imbalances to take real care of it, to integrate it with the rest of our being, to honor and love it, and recognize it as an expression of who and what we truly are. It is essential that we rediscover and treat the body as an inherently sacred expression of our fundamental nature, and that we outgrow our dissociative tendencies and judgment about body image. Somatic idealism has done incredible damage to us, as exemplified by the unending obsession with how we – and others – look.  Until we get under the skin of our distorted body image, journeying into and through its psychological origins, we will be at its mercy, held hostage by its ubiquitous mirrors. “The flesh” has been slapped with negative press for millennia, being associated with sin, carnality, moral weakness, and disease. Many of us don’t seem to like our body very much, or we may like it but not want it to change, as it inevitably must. In either case, we are burdening our body with unrealistic expectations, central among them our obsession with not showing signs of aging. Our body not only reveals what’s going on for us emotionally – through its posture, gestures, expression, but also signals our impermanent nature, no matter how much we try to stave off change through endless exercise, diet, or plastic surgery. If we don’t want to be reminded of our mortality, we are going to keep our distance from our body, despite the attention we may seem to lavish on it. So what’s a body to do?

As consciously as possible, bring awareness – compassionately wakeful attentiveness – into sensation, into emotion, and into the energetic  patternings and psychological holdings of the body. Moving toward and into emotion, feeling it in the raw and giving it room for expression while understanding its connection to events in our life, is an especially effective way to reconnect with the body. We may be resistant to doing this, given that there might be considerable pain and perhaps also trauma embedded in the deeper layers of emotion, but in contacting and freeing up such zones of feeling, we become more integrated, more intimate with our body.

and later in the chapter . . .

Getting back to the body means doing whatever is needed to cut through our disembodied experience, which in part means a journey into and through the very pain that first drove us to disown and dissociate from our body.

The first step is to name this pain, to openly acknowledge the reality of it. The second step is to turn toward it, however counterintuitive this might seem to us, so that we are directly facing it, and the third step is to enter it, getting beneath its surface and encountering its originating dynamics. In so doing we become not only more intimate with our pain, but also more intimate with our resistance to entering our pain. As we engage in this process, we find ourselves more and more immersed in our somatic reality, with a considerable deepening  of both our sensory and emotional awareness. We feel more deeply – feeling into, feeling for, feeling with – becoming increasingly present to our body. Instead of just thinking as we walk, we become more aware of the actual process of walking, enjoying the sensory flow and particulars of our experience. We may still feel much of our old pain, but now we can hold it in a way that catalyzes its healing.

Food for thought – eh?

in body & soul, Carol

“Who we are makes its appearance not in a body but as a body. This does not necessarily mean that we literally are our body, but that our body expresses rather than contains us.”

“To really feel our body is an art in which compassion, patience, and the spirit of exploration all coexist.”

Robert Masters

Being human is quite a conundrum. This is the only earthly vehicle we have for living an enlightened life, yet we are prone to resist it, hate it, abandon it, abuse it, judge it, ignore it . . . In general, we seem to be busy in a myriad of strategies to deal with this thing called life. How then, do we navigate the complex terrain of living a human life that neither idolizes nor devalues the body’s rightful place in the scheme of living a fully realized life?

I think of being human as a grand experiment of the soul: Is it possible to live as conscious matter, fully expressing and experiencing life in a body? And can we find ease and pleasure in being a complex integration of form and formless? Is it truly feasible to touch the infinite from the finite construct of our physicality? Could we stop fighting or resisting our life and just relax into all sensations as dancing energy? Can we open the vastness of our hearts and brilliance of our minds to allow our flesh and bone to fully participate in the awakening of consciousness and the evolution of the soul?

I have been actively traversing the maze of embodiment for quite some time and am very familiar with the quirks and pitfalls inherent in this endeavor. I am also keenly aware of the joyful moments of intimacy, ease and peace that are the over-arcing consequence of relaxing into the soul-filled enjoyment of this human life.

We so often feel alone – lost in this maze of confusion about the body and what it means to be human. You don’t have to be alone in this endeavor. Let me join you as a guide and co-conspirator to:

• shift your relationship to your body to one of clarity, strength, appreciation and pleasure
• walk with you as we tease apart the ways in which the ego holds your body captive in a jail of judgment
• discover your soul’s intimate, deliberate, devoted and affectionate union with your body
• recapture your exuberance for this life, in this body, at this time and in this space

With that in mind, I am offering a year long program:

Body and Soul: A Compassionate Conspiracy. This will include – 15 individual sessions (3 the first month, 2 the second month and once a month thereafter) and a full year of weekly Gyrokinesis classes. Together, we will approach this from many angles, including spiritual, psychological, physical, belief systems, movement, sensations – and who knows where else our co-conspiracy will take us.

Don’t underestimate what it means to be human.
Let’s journey together to:
Explore it. Embrace it. Co-create it
Respect it. Embellish it. Enjoy it.
Embody it!

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Here are the details:
Pay in Full: $1275
($975 for the 15 sessions which works out to be $65 per session / $300 for a year of weekly Gyrokinesis classes, a $600 value). You save $120 by paying in full.

Pay Monthly: $116

Sliding scale is a possibility, depending on your circumstance.

If the weekly Gyrokinesis classes don’t work for you, there are other possibilities that we can work with. And if you don’t live locally we can work with that as well.

This offering is near and dear to my heart and I would love to compassionately co-conspire with you to consciously explore the dynamic relationship of body and soul.

Please contact me for more information or to simply schedule your first session.

in body & soul, Carol

“Our imperfection is one of the most astonishingly beautiful facets of being human, for it is our imperfection that compels us forward. And it is our imperfection that must be met with the open embrace of unconditional love and compassionate kindness. It is our deep acceptance – and not our judgment – of our humanity that creates a more authentic, purposeful and joyful life.”

Carol McAnally

Many of us (particularly women) have, at one time or another, been guilty of talkin’ trash to or about our bodies.  You know – words and phrases filled with the judgment and distaste we sometimes feel when we look in the mirror, have aches and pains or find it difficult to maneuver around our physical lives. These rubbish words are plentiful and easily identifiable. You know what I’m talking about – we each have our favorite areas of aversion and ongoing allegations against the body. These thoughts are the easy ones to catch because they are so blatantly mean. And, I trust that you are doing what you can to be aware of that nasty voice and to quiet it with the deep love and acceptance that you inherently have for your body.

What about the more subtle ways you disrespect your body? hold it in contempt?  make unreasonable demands of it? wish it were anything but what it is? hate that it hurts, is sensitive or sick? are disappointed that it is not as resilient as it used to be? ignore its communication and wish it would just shut up?

These subtle messages flow below the surface of awareness, are non-verbal and much more destructive than the obvious ones. Is the answer to go after all those sneaky, subversive ways of judging ourselves, identify and then try to undo each one? Yuk! That sounds overwhelming, exhausting, unproductive, zero fun and potentially depressing.

What to do? Here are a few ideas:

Instead of thinking of the body as an IT, think of your body as SHE or HE. This takes you out of an object orientation with your body and into the possibility of relationship, partnership and mutuality. How is SHE feeling? What does SHE need?  What brings HER joy? How can I help HER? See if you can feel the difference in this simple turn of phrase.

Accept HER as she is, right here and right now. This may seem like old news, a bit trite and overused. It isn’t. The internalized programming that we can only accept her under certain conditions (thin, pretty, pain free, graceful, athletic . . .) must be arrested and put asunder – not by convincing yourself that she already has these attributes, but by letting go of needing her to be anything but what she is. Wanting her to be other than who she is currently,places you firmly in the future, unable to appreciate her or even truly experience her right now.

Yesterday during my errands around town, I practiced deep acceptance – not only for myself but for every woman I saw. I looked at each imperfectly perfect body and sent her unconditional love and acceptance. A sigh of relief moved through me and I felt waves of deep appreciation for women and a softening toward the challenges that we face, as a collective – needing desperately to relax the hardness with which we judge our bodies and nurture a more joyous and pleasurable way of being with her and caring for her.

Deep blessings to you and your body,  Carol

“ . . . God has been here all along. In the noise and in the stillness, in the upheavals and in the rafts of peace. In each moment of kindness you lavish upon your breaking heart or the size of your thighs, with each breath you take – God has been here. She is you.” Geneen Roth